dear___,
its been a while i know. but you know how it is... well you do. i told you! i found the last piece to my happiness! the epitome of beautiful. But i shall not fill the room with my joy, as she knows who she is and i know you do as well. I am happy and content. i couldn't be happier.
Which brings me to the reason why i am writing you this letter. Is it that hard to find a positive in life? I mean honestly... yeah, i'll admit that my life/upbringing has been pretty freaking fantastic!!! But that doesn't mean there hasn't been shit times in my life. But i've managed to find positives, not necessarily in the situation, but in situations around me. There is always a smile waiting for you somewhere and the worst thing most people know this and are offered this smile but just choose to ignore it! Now dont go thinking that im being all like 'GET OVER IT'. Cause i am not. Everyone gets upset and with good reason. BUT! you can't tell me nothing goes right for you when well im sitting there listening to you! If nothing went right for you you wouldnt have anyone listening to you!!! FUCK! it frustrates me! And what makes it worse is that people put it out there for the whole world to see!!! which in turn makes people not give a shit WHICH in turn makes that person upset all over again cause people don't care!!!
___ you know that i'm a firm believer in 'everything happens for a reason' which helps me accept alot of fucked up things that happen in this world! Some People ask me 'well whats the reason behind death' my main answer is to appreciate life even more than you already do! there is a reason to every situation. And you can always find something positive in life. I'm letting my anger out to you cause i know you know me!!! But i need to be more careful around others! i understand that some people actually suffer from depression which makes it alot harder to find positivity! But then there is the self loathers... the ones who sometimes claim they are depressed... but in the long run they are just self centred and attention seekers!!! NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR YOU SING ABOUT TRADGEDY! if you aren't willing to find the positive even when it is held right in front of your face, you have no right to whinge!!!
This is one of the only things that brings me down and gets me upset in life! there are some people who feel like they have no one and that saddens me and i will try my hardest to be that someone! then there are the others that look me in the eye, cry on my shoulder... that they have no one! i have no time for that. im right there and you're telling me you have no one, if you can't see the positivity or "help" you're being given, if you're choosing to ignore that because its not the exact thing you want then you are selfish greedy and dont deserve my time... maybe then you'll see what lonely is!!! this is harsh! i understand but___ you understand my frustration because we have talked about this before!!! i will give people chance after chance but there is a time where if it starts affecting me and bringing me down cause they wont let me help them or if they wont help themselves i need to get away!!!
Once again you have listened to one of my rants.... but dont get me wrong___ life is beautiful! this is the only thing that brings me down. but i've written it out and i will walk away from this with a song in my head that will bring me a smile and i am going to have lunch with the best human in my world!!! so there is the positive!!!
I hope to hear from you soon, you can always talk to me! Rant to me!
I love you.
Forever and After.
Sean
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